England: Fleeing dads start new lives

Submitted by anthony on Thu, 2006-12-14 20:20

Story here. Excerpt:

"I do find it interesting . . . how often when men fight for custody and don't get exactly what they want . . . those men just vanish from the child's life. And then you've kind of got proof that this was never about the father wanting to be involved with the child."

"Asked if men are leaving the country to get away from support payments, Debois responded with a link to a Global Television website promoting a documentary about two men's access struggles against a system they believe has a "deep and persistent gender bias against fathers."

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Comments

"And then you've kind of got proof that this was never about the father wanting to be involved with the child."

Not really.
What you have proof of is that 1 or 2 days every 2 weeks is NOT ENOUGH for the price they are forced to pay. In some cases, the mother will not allow the father to spend time with the kids by manipulating schedules to inflict emotional harm on the father (and the kids).

I FULLY SUPPORT this system as a means for fathers to start over if they need to. Consider it a "family law bankrupcy" filing - where the father gets to purge his own "file" and start a new life somewhere else.

If fathers are systematically prevented from access to their own flesh and blood, well, why not leave?

It is 1 of very few FATHER'S RIGHTS.

oregon dad

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Submitted by oregon dad on Fri, 2006-12-15 17:57

I don't care how bad stuff gets between me and the woman I may be with. My kids mean a hell of a lot to me, and I wouldn't abandon them.

That's using the kids as pawns, and deciding if you don't get your own way you're just gonna take your ball and go home.

And how do you think it'll make the kids feel, being abandoned?

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Submitted by EevilYoungFlesh on Fri, 2006-12-15 22:11

Fair enough.

Now, consider your woman decides to leave you and take your kids with her. And she will not allow you to see your own kids, your own flesh and blood, even when the judge gives you 2 days a month to see them. Furthermore, you are required to pay child support for your children - who you cannot see because she is blocking your access to them.

I FULLY SUPPORT a system that helps a man extract himself from a system that stacks the deck entirely against him and his children.

Certainly, you are free to oppose this tyranny and many, many men are forced to. And they lose. And they NEVER get to see their children. Or, they may get to see them 2-4 days out of the month. Seems like something is not quite right with that formula.

Now, if there were shared parenting and equal cost and equal time, AS THE FUNDAMENTAL REQUIREMENT, then I would agree with your knee jerk interpretation of what you did not read or understand.

But, its not like that is it?

oregon dad

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Submitted by oregon dad on Sat, 2006-12-16 02:37

The solution is to get the judge's orders enforced and to fight to see your kids.

Not to say "well, if things don't go my way, they can starve, too."

Seems to me you're looking for an excuse to walk away from your kids financially as well as emotionally.

I feel sorry for your kids.

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Submitted by EevilYoungFlesh on Fri, 2006-12-22 19:52