Dr Spier: "Dating Advice Creates Female Narcissists"

Dr Hannah Spier presents yet another fantastic video essay: "How Dating Advice Creates Female Narcissists."

“High-value woman” dating advice promises better men, stronger boundaries and a softer life. A new manifestation of feminism. But much of it is really a guide to entitlement, strategic detachment and low reciprocity—traits that make lasting relationships almost impossible.

This is really a howto guide for making women into narcissists.

Dr. Spier plays short videos of women describing the concept and practice of "high-value woman" and critiques them... with humor and well-earned condemnation.

Over the last 10 years, there's this internet subculture popular trend. Dating coaches and influencers are telling women how to how to become a high value woman. And it's really just a how-to guide for becoming a narcissist. According to them, all they need to do is change their mindset and change their lifestyle. And with that, they can then attract a high status man to support their soft life, which is really just them rejecting the hustle culture and the girl boss era because they realize they don't really want to work that hard. They just simply refuse to accept less than they know they deserve.

...

Honestly, with this stuff, this modern self-care and empowerment movement, they just weaponized the concept of making yourself a priority into justifying low empathy, relational rigidity, and complete lack of compromise. That is what this is about.

This is why I just hate that word "boundaries". It doesn't mean what they think it means. What they're doing is playing a a game of chess to artificially inflate their market value. I mean, this is just textbook demonstration of extremely low agreeableness, which is really just narcissism. And that is what narcissism is: low agreeableness, extraversion and because in there is ambition and self-promotion and getting that without any concern for other people. In a nutshell, that is what narcissism [clears throat] is because that will always look confident and they're able to fake competence and that comes across as grandiosity. It's really just self-promo promotion without concern for anyone.

And they're usually quite emotionally stable. So this manifests here as hostility and a complete unwillingness to cooperate.

Full video essay available here.