Two articles from 'Beyond the Bris'

Submitted by Matt on Sun, 2012-03-25 17:24

Me But Not My Son: A Young Jewish Man Breaks Rank on Circumcision Excerpt:

'I am 21 years old, Jewish, and opposed to circumcision. I attend college in Indiana. I grew up in a small Southern town where my family was one of a handful of Jews. My parents were born and raised Jewish. I was circumcised when I was eight days old by a mohel at a brit milah.

My Jewish identity was always very important to me growing up. I went to synagogue a lot, spent my summers at a Jewish summer camp, had a bar mitzvah, and in high school was part of NFTY (North American Federation of Temple Youth). I went to Israel for a semester in high school. When I was a child and teenager, I was always proud to be Jewish, to be a part of G-d’s chosen people, to be in a culture that valued life and not death. I’m also a person who finds the idea of permanent body modification disturbing. I feel G-d made us the way we are for a reason. Every organ has a purpose. Even our imperfections are a sign of our individuality. When I found out I was circumcised, I was horrified.'

Bringing a Jewish Circumcision Alternative (Brit Shalom) to New York Metro Families Excerpt:

'The Jewish opposition to circumcision was just beginning 24 years ago when my wife Yehudit and I decided to leave our newborn son intact. We were not the only Jewish parents of our generation to reject circumcision, but we were among the first.

I performed my son’s birth ceremony and it was beautiful. We called it a brit b’lee milah or “covenant without circumcision.” The gift of life came unencumbered by any cutting and joy permeated the room. All three of Samuel’s living grandparents refused to attend his brit because they knew no circumcision would be taking place. This only made what Yehudit and I had decided to do more powerful. There was no going back.'

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Comments

I feel this man's pain. Around age 22, I realized that I was not okay with my circumcision. I was living with my parents at the time and confronted my mom about it one day when she decided to argue with me.

She was completely devoid of sympathy, and seemed to be angry that I had even thought I had a right to be upset about it.

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Submitted by xtrnl on Sun, 2012-03-25 19:39

I was a bit older but she was immediately defensive about it. Looks to me like deep down, they know what they did was wrong but just can't accept it.

But they were still wrong and won't cop to it. Just proof that as much as we may love our parents, they make mistakes-- huge ones, sometimes, and are far from perfect. Unfortunately, often their kids pay the price for their poor judgment and/or intransigence.

For every person walking the Earth, there's someone paying the price for their parents' sins.

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Submitted by Matt on Tue, 2012-03-27 01:28

Did you guys confront your dads? If not, why not?

I pray my children never ask me about their circumcisions. It is something I am dreading, however I will discuss it honestly and tell them I regret it if the time should ever come.

I am not trying to pass blame, but for me it was more the father's decision then mine. I specifically looked at him as to what to do and he wanted them circumcised. My husband has no regrets about being circumcised himself.

I also was unable to talk my brother out of circumcising his son, and his wife gave him the final word.

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Submitted by Kris on Tue, 2012-03-27 03:36

My Dad was also present when I confronted my mother. I suppose you could say I confronted both of them at the same time. It was just my mother was the only one who said anything. My dad just kind of remained silent. It still kind of bothers me that they never said sorry for making a decision for me which they had no right to make.

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Submitted by xtrnl on Tue, 2012-03-27 03:53

Dad was silent the entire time, as I imagined he would be.

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Submitted by Matt on Tue, 2012-03-27 18:23