Ladies, even in your love life, you better get that commitment to gender equality in writing

Submitted by Mastodon on Mon, 2018-12-31 14:30

Article here. Excerpt:

'The question women need to ask is, why are we entering into contracts (ahem, marriages) that aren’t fair to us? Why aren’t we negotiating? In the same way that women’s reticence to negotiate at work has contributed to the pay gap, women’s reticence to negotiate at home may be contributing to the domestic-workload gap. Marriage is the only contract we sign without any terms or conditions. Prenuptial agreements are the exception. Perhaps women need a “prenup” to protect their non-tangible assets — their career aspirations and, most of all, their time.
...
Dear single women, get it in writing. As for married women, the negotiation is trickier because precedents have been set. Not all is lost, terms and conditions can be established with the help of a good therapist who can set up ground rules, draft a contract and assist in course correction.

If the word “contract” seems harsh in reference to marriage it is only because we have forgotten that marriage actually is a contract. Divorce is the rudest reminder that you are in a contract since it requires a dissolution of the terms you never realized existed. The problem with not having a written contract is that memories of verbal agreements inevitably fade. We slowly regress to previous habits, and around we go, stuck in a maddening loop.

Surely, none of this is romantic. But inequity is hardly an aphrodisiac.'

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Comments

... how at work occasionally a honcho has a big meeting and he starts talking about stuff that's happening in the company that shows he clearly has no idea at all how things are actually done in the company.

After such a meeting you are reminded of what it means to say someone "lives in his own world".

This lady actually thinks women have to be dragged kicking and screaming to the altar and further it's a bad thing for them to be married, as a general rule.

Well maybe for women outearning prospective partners who are focused like lasers on their careers and have no interest in being mothers or in the role of "mom", then yes. Marriage isn't your thing. That is bc it is "N/A" for you: Non-applicable. You see my dear author, marriage was conceived of for specific reasons. These reasons center around providing economic and social security to women and children. If a woman has little need for either, then marriage isn't an applicable concept for her.

Sort of like getting handed a manual on boat maintenance when one not only doesn't own a boat but has no real abiding interest in boating.

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Submitted by Matt on Tue, 2019-01-01 01:34

Feminist: female of species with an abiding hatred of and contempt for for males, and females who don't comply with strict ideological gender parsed tenants. Best identified by their love of femsplaining to everyone about everything they know nothing about.

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Submitted by rabel111 on Tue, 2019-01-01 22:10

Marriage is indeed a contract, but feminists have repeatedly told women they don't have to keep their part of the contract. Modern divorce law also makes that clear. The man, on the other hand, is expected to keep his part of the bargain. Thus, marriage has become a unilateral obligation for the man, but a contract with no obligations for the woman. That's why it still appeals to women: they get a lot in return for giving little.

Marriage still remains one of the primary ways in which male wealth is transferred to females, so women are reluctant to give it up. Marriage also gives women the option to work or not work, though it doesn't give men the same option. A woman can simply quit her job and stay home; a man can't, if he wants to stay married.

Marriage has become a bad deal for men because women don't keep their part of the contract, though they demand more and more from the contract. Until women are expected to keep their part of the bargain, marriage rates will continue to plummet.

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Submitted by el cid on Wed, 2019-01-02 14:48