Why It’s Imperative to Teach Empathy to Boys

Submitted by Mastodon on Sun, 2014-06-29 18:05

Article here. Excerpt:

'Why is empathy important? First, empathy breeds courage. In a recent study of nearly 900 youth, ages 11-13, Nicola Abbott and Lindsey Cameron’s, psychology researchers at University of Kent, found that participants with higher levels of empathy were more likely to engage in “assertive bystander behavior.” In other words, they were willing to stand up to a bully on behalf of someone outside their peer group. This kind of courage can be life changing for a victim of bullying and prevent the damaging effects of social isolation and exclusion that often lead to anxiety and depression.

Empathy also yields happiness. People with empathy have stronger interpersonal connections and are more eager to collaborate, effectively negotiate, demonstrate compassion, and offer support. They’re team players, and employers recognize this. So important has this skill become that a research team in England, after engaging in a six-month review of its schools, submitted a report that placed empathy in the top three of important outcomes for its students. Similarly, employers, when asked to compile a list of the “20 People Skills You Need to Succeed at Work,” placed it fifth.
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What Parents Can Do

Play with dolls. Parents will find that boys can be just as interested as girls in playing with dolls. Just watch little boys when they interact with an infant: they want to pat the baby’s head and see the little toes, and their faces show distress when that baby starts to cry. Recognizing the importance of young children’s interactions with babies for building social skills, organizations like Roots of Empathy do just that. They bring babies into elementary school classrooms as part of their empathy building, evidence-based programs. Don’t have a baby at hand? Dolls allow young children to simulate dressing, feeding, calming and caring for babies – particularly if adults participate and model this care. For parents of boys, it’s worth a trip to the pink aisles to find one.
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Empathy, “an understanding that other people have feelings, and that those feelings count,” is a learned behavior. For boys, as for girls, that learning begins in infancy. As University of Wisconsin’s Carolyn Zahn-Waxler aptly notes, “There is no gene for empathy.” Parents play a key role in nurturing empathy, from explaining others’ feelings to encouraging prosocial behaviors with friends and siblings. Playroom toys and forms of play are equally important. Given all the benefits associated with empathy for success in life and work, it seems like now, more than ever, we need to mind the gap.'

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Comments

... then why are women presumed to be "natural nurturers"? Well, feminists insist it's a social role. So in that vein, wouldn't girls also need to be taught empathy just like boys? Thus, why does the author single out boys? After all, girls are just as capable at bullying/non-empathic behavior as boys. It may not take the form of pantsing the geeky kid at lunchtime, but arguably the way girls go at each other in the "Queen Bee" politics of social destruction that starts in earnest in middle school and goes right up through high school graduation is nothing anyone would volunteer for. Neither form of bullying is any fun for the bullied, and children of both sexes participate in it all the time. Seems *children* could use classes in empathy, not just male children.

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Submitted by Matt on Mon, 2014-06-30 04:32

I refuse to concede the argument that men are lacking in compassion.

Men created nearly every major work of Opera, Literature, Poetry, Art, Sculpture, Dance/Choreography.

It is men who fought for and drafted the major documents that have ensured liberty, from the Magna Carta to the Declaration of Independence; from the Koran, to the Talmud, to the Bible: it is almost all men.

If feminists would back off the incessant vilification of men (after OD'ing on the false depictions of men in shows like Mad Men), maybe men can return again to nurturing their sons and daughters with compassion... as... as...as... as they have always done... naturally.

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Submitted by ThomasI on Mon, 2014-06-30 08:06

Men are compassionate. That's why they invented medicine to ease the suffering of the sick. That's why they will risk their lives to save the lives of others. It's a very practical compassion, not just some warm and fuzzy feeling.

Here's an experiment: Read stories of "Good Samaritans." I did and discovered something: about nine times out of ten, a "Good Samaritan" is a man. Were these men lacking compassion?

And Warren Farrell found that studies indicate the presence of a father in the home increases empathy in both girls and boys.

Feminists often talk about female empathy--and yet most of what they want is for someone to have empathy for them. I'm a poor victim; feel sorry for me. I'm more to be pitied than censured. Very rarely, if at all, do feminists practice empathy for either men or children. Asking someone to show empathy for you is not the same thing as showing empathy for other people. It's easy to feel empathy for yourself; the hard thing is feeling empathy for others.

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Submitted by el cid on Mon, 2014-06-30 12:28

Boys don't need to be taught empathy, you sexist pigs! It is inherent to them, unless they are severely mistreated. What a waste of space this bigoted article was!

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Submitted by xtrnl on Wed, 2014-07-02 23:36