"All men should take responsibility for violence"

Hello Editor -

I am writing in response to Joan Roberts article which suggested that men are not being punished (enough) for crimes against women.

She wrote: "Calling these acts domestic violence is a convenient way to downplay and push aside this crime. Why not call it what it really is: male violence against women and children?"

Additionally she states, "when you allow other men to act violently and take no responsibility for their actions, you are tarnished with the same brush."

Please let me point out that Joan Roberts is probably a little bit behind in her condemnation and has not yet caught up with the fact that women are just as violent as men in heterosexual relationships. This link provides over 150 academic studies showing very clearly that women are just as, if not more, violent than men in heterosexual relationships.

www.csulb.edu/~mfiebert/assault.htm.

Furthermore, WOMEN ARE THE LEADING ABUSERS AND MUDERERS OF CHILDREN IN U.S. HOMES.
Joan Roberts should educate herself.

http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/cb/pubs/cm06/figure4_2.htm

The University of New Hampshire recently performed a 32-nation study of dating violence and found women are as violent and controlling as men in dating relationships. http://www.unh.edu/news/cj_nr/2006/may/em_060519male.cfm?type=n
http://pubpages.unh.edu/~mas2/ID41E2.pdf

The University of Florida recently found women more likely to “stalk, attack and abuse” their partners http://news.ufl.edu/2006/07/13/women-attackers/

Harvard Medical School announced the same thing.
http://www.patienteducationcenter.org/aspx/HealthELibrary/HealthETopic.aspx?cid=M0907d

A Canadian government report says the same thing.
http://www.phac-aspc.gc.ca/ncfv-cnivf/familyviolence/pdfs/Intimate_Partner.pdf

It seems that Joan Roberts has a very emotional response to a problem everybody recognizes as serious. However, calling out just the men is a very serious error if one is to truely address the problem. Women are every bit as culpable in this situation - and ONLY CALLING OUT THE MEN AS THE PROBLEM CAN ONLY MAKE THE PROBLEM WORSE.

As a society, domestic violence needs to be addressed for what it is. A human problem.
Allowing our government to provide funding to only women's groups for women's shelters, while at the same time denying and ignoring the overwhelming amount of data indicating that women are serious contributers to the problem is foolish, wasteful, tragic, and dangerous.

I would suggest to Ms. Roberts that during most young boys period of growing they learn some very valuable lessons. One of which is, "you never pick on someone bigger, stronger, and tougher than you are". Women don't learn these important lessons during their upbringing, and unfortunately when they strike a man (FIRST!!) - they will probably be shocked at the response. Boys know that getting your nose smacked by a fist REALLY REALLY HURTS. And they avoid behavior that will likely result in such a response - and are widely considered stupid if they don't. Women - due to their protected upbringing - don't learn this "fact of life".

And finally - she challenges the Fathers out in the reading audience "Are you raising your sons so they will not act in a violent way?" and I answer back...

For my Son I teach: in this time of "equality" - any person that physically assaults you must be held accountable for their actions - whether male or female. For all persons are "equal" before the law.

Sincere Regards,
oregon dad

you could take the whole thing

put a dead man's name in it, say Reverend Winkler,
ya'll remember the preacher shotgunned in his bed by his loving wife,
who then claimed (falsely?) that she was battered, w/o ANYBODY to
verify same. what, a few days in jail?

and EVERY word of this would equally apply to women doing the same thing to men,
only worse by trying to hide it, not covering it in the press AT ALL, and openly trying to shame honest men for saying anything.

then the fems steal every dime of funding (v.a.w.a.) needed to help solve this 2 sided problem.

not to mention screwing up the law getting the feminist rewarding one-sided laws passed so they can freely walk out of court rooms after committing in your face murder. just ask the Reverend's family.

what's that word i'm looking for?

oh yeah, selfish one-way bitches. i think i see the problem too.

Hello.

I just read this article, and I must say that it was one of the most hate-filled, misleading, misandric, and naive things I've ever seen. Anybody who thinks that domestic violence is a crime that is committed by only men against women is living in the stone age! Several universities in the United States and around the world have done psychological studies proving the duluth model to be nothing more than anti-male propaganda. And to blame the entire male gender for the violence committed by a few members of the same gender? Isn't that kind of like asking all blacks to take responsibility for all the violence black gang members commit? How somebody could think so bigotrously is truly offensive. People who write things this juvenile and infactual should not be given jobs writing for publications!

BTW, I've read countless articles about violence committed against men by women. What is your gender doing to ensure that more men won't be victims? Perhaps all women should take responsibility for violence!

Here is an article written by a REAL journalist I would like you to check out. It shatters your stereotypes:

http://network.nationalpost.com/np/blogs/fullcomment/archive/2008/10/15/barbara-kay-a-big-piece-of-stone-just-fell-out-of-the-domestic-violence-version-of-the-berlin-wall.aspx

Evan AKA X-TRNL
Real Men Don't Take Abuse!

Great letters, Oregon Dad and Xtrnl.

OD's letter reminds me of when I was dating my children's father, he is a very large man (6'8'' - 280 lbs.). He told me that if I ever hit him, he would hit me back. Needless to say, we never had any violence in our relationship.

Is he a pro-wrestler? (just kidding)

I would rather not say what he does. He is not that well known, I just don't want anyone googling him, or for him to google me and then read what I have written about him (I don't think I have said anything bad....yet (just kidding).

BTW, I probably exagerated on his weight, but he is a big guy none the less.

Thank you for the compliment. All it took was reading that trash to give me all the motivation I needed to write the publication. It's one of those articles where there's so much bigotry, your jaw just drops and hits the floor as you read it.

BTW, I didn't mean the part where I said "perhaps all women should take responsibility for violence". I just said that to grind Ms. Roberts' gears.

As Oregon dad put it, this is a two-sided HUMAN problem, with a solution that requires co-operation from both genders. Violence clearly knows no gender.

Evan AKA X-TRNL
Real Men Don't Take Abuse!