Columnist praises men who stay with wife and child even after paternity fraud is known

I've noticed this kind of tactic before. Rather than condemn the bad action, those who tolerate it are held up as examples of some kind of virtue, such as forgiveness, etc. The author of this column indeed is right in that men who decide because of their emotional attachment to a child to stay with the child as his or her father are indeed special men worthy of praise. What she is skipping out on here is insisting that women who knowingly (operative word here is "knowingly") defraud men in this way be held accountable in no uncertain terms. There are many ways this could be done: upholding the right of a man to sue the defrauding woman for damages (married or not to her), assign full exclusive parental rights over the child to the man, etc. By making the penalty severe, the woman who would defraud a man this way is deterred from doing so, or at least, may be deterred. but the mechanism for justice to be served would at least be in place. At the moment, it isn't.

What is also missing is the author affirming the right of any man so defrauded to immediately remove himself without penalty from the defrauding woman and the child who is not really his child, and to sue the woman for damages. The fault should be left entirely with the defrauding woman, both legally and morally. Sympathy should rest with the man and child while shame and legal consequences should rest on the defrauding woman.

Because of the widely available over-the-counter paternity tests, we can expect to see more of these kind of stories.

Feminist spin doctors. They can eat my shorts.

What the author has done is what we so often hear: equating fatherhood with child support. This article is not about lauding men who decide to raise children who are not theirs——men, after all, are natural mentors——it's about men who choose to finance the female's infidelity.

She doesn't even consider that men should be "allowed" to participate in the upbringing of non-biological children (or biological children, for that matter) only their child support. Yeah, ma'am, that's a real father for ya. It's all about the money.

Let's see, would the author be willing to help raise her husband's child by his girlfriend if her old man got custody? Further, would she be willing to pay child support for that child if she and her husband broke up?

Yeah, right!

"I also have met many men who, when faced with this identical dilemma, considered their options, took a deep breath and became the father to a child who was not their own."

What "choice(s)" did they have??? Did those men have choice(s) equal to those women would have in these situations? Absolutely not, therefore I find the statement in quotes above to be highly hypocritical.

Equal Choices For Men

Too often, our media focus on the boys who make babies and walk away, and ignores the men who, with full knowledge and free will, quietly shoulder the responsibility, become a partner to the mother and take the father's seat at the table.

Gosh, I hope these fools are few and far between.

There is NO EXCUSE for paternity fraud...NONE!

I have to agree this article is nothing more than a backhand slap to men, telling them to shut up and put up with paternity fraud. Just because some men decide to do something, does not mean that Paternity Fraud is right.

I am registering on that site and I going to leave a comment condemning the author for her stupidity.

If it were possible for women to feel the heart wrenching pain of discovering that a child you thought was yours isn't really, and that your spouse has been unfaithful and you have been raising the adulteror's child, articles like this regarding women would not exist. If it were possible for women to be put in a position like this, they wouldn't stay with a betrayer nor agree to raise a product of the betrayal. (Or pay extortionist child support)

I can't help but agree with mc99. Men clearly have no obligation to stay with a woman who betrayed him in such a monumental manner. To have mentioned this in your article would have been nice. Also, chastising those who defraud others would have been nice. Shame on the child support systems that enforce child support on men for children that aren't theirs! Shame on the women who rob men through deceit and a legal raping!

There is no way to justify paternity fraud. To allow women to be able to relate to how big of a betrayal paternity fraud really is, think about this. If your man got another woman pregnant would you pay child support and help raise the child? I highly doubt it...

Evan AKA X-TRNL
Real Men Don't Take Abuse!

I applaud women who are raped by some horny guy and don't raise a fuss. The guy was a little drunk and didn't know any better. Why do you need to put your petty needs (like right to not get raped) over his needs (like right to get ass)? You dressed hot so you were asking for it. I salute women who don't tie up resources going after guys who raped them.

/sarcasm

That is an excellent analogy.

Evan AKA X-TRNL
Real Men Don't Take Abuse!