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by Hunchback on 06:44 PM August 4th, 2005 EST (#1)
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That's an excellent idea. Even if it doesn't encourage men to seek matrimony at a different state, should a magazine (men's?) get wind of the website and write an article, it would pressure some states to change their image. All states hate bad publicity. Think what the list of cities with highest crime did to the image of certain locations. Also it's a great boon to men to be forewarned. Had I known of my state's approach to divorce and separation, I would have never gotten married.
Different states have different things wrong with their divorce laws. Virginia, for example, may be "for lovers," but should you fall behind in child, they are quicker to throw you in jail than most states. Sentences are sometimes measured in YEARS! Michigan is another state that practices draconian CS enforcement. New York is less likely to encarcerate you, but grants mothers custody 97% of the time, shared parenting being a foreign concept.
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by canaryguy
(nospam.canaryguy@nospam.stealthfool.com)
on 11:56 PM August 4th, 2005 EST (#2)
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That's an excellent idea. Even if it doesn't encourage men to seek matrimony at a different state, should a magazine (men's?) get wind of the website and write an article, it would pressure some states to change their image. All states hate bad publicity.
I'm all for it! Put in a summary table and have state by state comments. Give each state a male-friendly rating -- five stars == couldn't get any friendlier, zero stars == pack up and leave guys!
All men must know this information! Especially college age men. If you were Boston or San Francisco, how would you feel if young, smart, college-educated men were avoiding settling in your city because of the legal climate?
Read Richard Florida's book, "Rise of the Creative Class". He believes that cities that fail to attract the best and brightest will suffer for it. It is very popular with leadership with most progressive cities. If you were a mayor and a significant chunk of college graduates were shunning your city in large numbers, what would you do?
What would make this much more effective is to punch through the media clutter and get some real attention. A couple hundred men picketing next year's N.O.W. convention might help...
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by Uberganger on 07:38 AM August 8th, 2005 EST (#15)
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...should a magazine (men's?) get wind of the website and write an article...
Excuse me? Why aren't there already strong links between the men's movement and men's magazines? And why do we have to wait for a magazine to 'get wind' of it? It's pretty easy to see why the manhaters have the media in their pocket. Perhaps if MRAs sneak around for another thirty years something might happen.
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by Anonymous User on 08:36 AM August 5th, 2005 EST (#3)
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Go for it. Various criteria: gender profiling practices in DV; child custody; perjury prosecutions in divorce/child custody cases (to the best of my knowledge all state score zero there); overzealous child molestation prosecutions.
Of course there are others...give me time.
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by Anonymous User on 09:11 AM August 5th, 2005 EST (#4)
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One should separate issues with children as they are completely state controlled. One key is no-fault versus fault divorce. States with fault divorce (some level of accountability)wuld be vastly more preferrable (i.e. not Calfiorniat, Oregon, Washington, etc) . Also, states that have a good record supporting prenuptial agreements (something every man who get married should have for protection).
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by TheMadNucleus on 09:35 AM August 5th, 2005 EST (#6)
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Again - some excellent suggestgions - I am keeping a log of these for new project.
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by Demonspawn on 11:57 AM August 5th, 2005 EST (#8)
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I'm not so sure fault divorce would be preferable to no-fault. Fault divorce tends to lead towards false allegations against the divorsee. I don't have stastics (anyone who does would help) but I do remember hearing that women file for divorce more often than the man does.
--Demonspawn
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by Anonymous User on 02:11 PM August 5th, 2005 EST (#9)
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A true No-Fault divorce system would be a godsend.
People originally wanted a no-fault system because if two spouses wanted a divorce, they would have to jump through hoops to get it. A spouse would have to admit to a trumped up charge (agreed to by both), some going so far as to hiring a third party to commit adultery with a cooperative spouse.
What people wanted was a true No-Fault divorce system where two people could agree to separate. What they got was an abomination what allowed one spouse to unilaterally divorce the other.
You can blame the usual suspects for that.
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by TheMadNucleus on 09:13 AM August 5th, 2005 EST (#5)
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All - Thanks for your input - please keep it coming. I'm going to see if this is possible - the key is the source of data - how can we determine reasonably acurate state level data. Maybe state survey's of men who have gone through divorces - have them rate the various catagories and also include the level of conflict in their divorce. All thoughts, suggests, etc. welcome.
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by TheMadNucleus on 02:31 PM August 6th, 2005 EST (#11)
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Yeah - agreed - international would be interesting. But I was thinking more interms of make states take responsibility for their constituents. I.e. Money Talks - and it will move where the best scenario is. I.e. Men would be well advixed, considering the likelihood of facing this mess, to move to a state that has the most favorable laws. Few men would consider moving out of the country for advantages in this are.
Also - it seems difficult enough to get data on the states, let alone getting it for many other countries.
Tom
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by TheMadNucleus on 01:51 PM August 7th, 2005 EST (#14)
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Thanks Dittohd - Actually - since my original post, I have found a considerable amount of info, for example Ancpr (Lowell Jaks site) contains a link to the Federal Child Supprt governance and a form for each state that fully details there Child support laws - ahhhh a begining.
The trick is as you say - considerable individual law research to evaluate trends in custody. But I would think that there would be an easy way to find if there is a presumption of shared or sole custody. Still looking for that one.
Tom
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by Dittohd on 11:43 AM August 10th, 2005 EST (#16)
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TheMadNucleus,
If you decide to give up on this project, please let me know because I will consider doing it.
You can get me the message by adding a comment to this or any other subject thread with my name, Dittohd, included in the body of the posting (you must spell it correctly, though).
If you get to the end and decide to self-publish, there's a good book that I'm presently in the middle of reading entitled, "The Self-Publishing Manual: How to Write, Print and Sell Your Own Book", by Dan Poynter. It's in its 14th printing, the first having been done in 1979 so it's definitely passed the test of time. The current 14th printing is dated 2003. On Amazon.com, it has a full 5 star rating for 133 reviews which is phenomenal, a true testament to the quality of the advice in the book.
Good luck on the project. I think it's a great idea.
Dittohd
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by TheMadNucleus on 05:36 AM August 11th, 2005 EST (#17)
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Hi Dittohd,
Appreciate the offer and support. It is going to be a tough road - I am still in the planning stages at this point.
Assuming I don't give up on the project :-) please feel free to stay in touch with me on any suggestions. contributions, etc., then, if you wish you can be a co-author or contributing author. I really have littel self interest in this - I am more concerned that men be aware of what's going on out there before it is too late.
I have noted your self publishing book suggestion and want to thank you very much for that - it really looks great and is just what I need.
Please feel free to contact via Toms_cyber_mail@yahoo.com
Tom
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by Anonymous User on 10:09 AM August 5th, 2005 EST (#7)
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TMN writes "Not sure where to air this idea so I am trying a few places. What would really be great is a webpage and or Articles/Ads which list all of the states and rate them in terms of Men "friendliness" during custody and child support cases. Sort of a “Places Rated Almanac” for men considering parenthood or are parents (actually would apply to all men considering the risk men are at for out-of wed-lock births as well). Considering that about 1 in 2 marriages fail – most men really need this information and it is critical to their well being and their children’s well being."