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Kate Santich
Orlando Sentinel
Dear Kate,
Thank you for writing the article "Fall guys" in the Orlando Sentinel on May 22. I actually live in metro Denver, but was able to read it because there was a link to it in MANN.
I myself became so fed up with misandry in the media and general society that I created my own online group in 2001. It's now called Men's Issues Online, and the web address for it is http://groups.yahoo.com/group/MensIssuesOnline . The fact that it has grown to over 700 members in just a few years indicates the severity of the problem of misandry.
While your article concentrates on male-bashing ads, that is just the tip of the iceberg. In my brochure "What are Men's Issues?" I have attempted to compile a list of men's issues in the following categories:
- Divorce and Child Custody
- Domestic Violence against Men
- Media Representation of Men
- Workplace Issues for Men
- Men’s Health and Safety
- Education
- Other issues: Male only selective service, unequal sentencing, false accusations, and double standards against men
In case you're interested, I have attached a copy of this brochure to this email.
Again, thanks for your article.
Sincerely,
Steven G. Van Valkenburg
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I just wanted to thank you for your coverage of man-bashing advertising, which I saw in the online version of the Orlando Sentinel dated May 22, 2004.
I think the destructiveness goes beyond its effects on men. Anytime a group is scapegoated the way men are these days, they develop a certain attitude and hostility toward the group bashing them. While this may not be overtly expressed right away, it will eventually come out in increased dismissal and reactive dehumanization of women. I am deeply concerned that the excesses of radical feminism and the current cultural atmosphere are the seeds of a deep and long term animosity which boys of today will hold toward females in the future.
At the very best, we are seeing a progressive withdrawal by males from participation in the culture at large. Most traditional media outlets are seeing a decline in their audience, the most pronounced being loss of men in the 18-34 age group by television. More and more men are turning to the internet for information and entertainment.
A phrase which has entered the lexicon recently is "the marriage strike." The marriage rate declined almost 40 percent from 1960 to 2000, while the divorce rate increased 105%. The mind games of "men are Peter Pans who can't make a commitment" have run their course and the progressive undermining of the role of fathers is beginning to have a major effect on the willingness of young men to marry. As an every increasing percentage of men choose to remain single, they will become a buying demographic which advertisers will be foolish to alienate.
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by Anonymous User on 06:58 AM May 24th, 2004 EST (#3)
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Kate:
Thanks for your article. Men live under the hate of radical/gender feminist laws and oppression on a daily basis. I'm not taking it anymore. Here is my most recent article published on Men's News Daily
http://mensnewsdaily.com/archive/a-b/a-b-misc/blum horst052204.htm
I have taken to wearing T-shirts in public that express my disgust with the villification and criminalization of all things male. Here's a recent one,
http://www.cafeshops.com/mensbiz.11297421?zoom=yes #zoom
Can you guess how fed up I am with all the man-hating going on in America?
Sincerely,
Ray
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by Anonymous User on 01:27 PM May 24th, 2004 EST (#4)
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I find it interesting that none of the companies responsible for male-bashing ads would comment.
In my expirience, people who have SOMETHING to hide never have SOMETHING to say.
Oh and by the way, I DO, PERSONALY take issue with that, "Are these men's activists the same guys who grease paint their chests and beat drums" remark.
As a matter of fact I HAVE been known to beat a drum. It is part of MOST American Indian religious ceremonies...!
Thundercloud.
"Hoka hey!"
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by Anonymous User on 07:28 PM May 24th, 2004 EST (#5)
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Oh and by the way, I DO, PERSONALY take issue with that, "Are these men's activists the same guys who grease paint their chests and beat drums" remark."
That quote is just another example of how the politically correct are insensitive, and show the hypocrisy of their own beliefs. It’s manifest in their intolerant words, and is just one more way they try to insult all men, yet don't have the capacity to see past the bigoted noses on their faces.
I think this T-shirt would be perfect for any holier-than-thou man who tries to belittle other men by making puffed up self-rightreous statements.
Ray
(click) Model for Men
(Please do not scroll up the page of the linked item(s). All the info I am trying to convey is only as the page comes up initially.)
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by Anonymous User on 01:11 PM May 25th, 2004 EST (#8)
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Ray.
Yes, I took offence to the remark because it implies that body painting and drumming some how makes one less credible, savage and infiriour. You know, like an INDIAN.
So what if ALL men's activists engaged in such activity? So what? does that make them LESS entitled to fair and equal rights? It SHOULD'NT. but appearantly these jokers beleive it does.
BTW, Don't most WOMEN paint their faces...?
Thundercloud.
"Hoka hey!"
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by Anonymous User on 02:24 AM May 25th, 2004 EST (#7)
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"Dear Ray,
You're certainly not alone! I have been flooded with e-mails and calls. Obviously, the issue touched a nerve.
Best regards,
Kate Santich"
=================================================
It's really good to see people speaking up about this. Now the only question is how long will it take for misandric advertisers to get the message? Are words enough to change misandric advertisers and their misandrist advertisements, or do they have to wait to see "the bottom line" taking big hits?
Ray
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Dear Kate Sastich,
I am so happy that someone finally wrote what most of us guys already know: making fun of men is easy because, for the most part, we don't complain.
I won't make this a long letter, but I wanted to sincerely thank you. I belong to a few men's groups, and although I have a sense of humor, I also notice that men's viewing (for late teens to early adult) has dropped considerably. The networks claim to be scratching their heads and not understanding, but I think they know. Show after show men are boobs, incompetant, thugs, "unable to connect to their feelings", etc etc ... while women are strong, reliable, versatile, "victims/survivors" (of males), and models. There are some very smart people working in programming and they know why we are not watching. It's simple: women control something like 70-80% of consumer dollars and if the advertisers or shows tick off the women then the advertisters will pull their products and their funding. Since men are less likely to object, and the women find the ads inoffensive (it's not THEM being made fun of) and harmless (they are not the one's being demeaned) it's a soft sell. But again, male viewership is declining.
Again, thank you so much Kate (great name by the way - lol, it's my sister's name) for taking the time to get men's and men's groups perspectives for this articles. I cannot tell you how many articles I have seen written about what men want, what they feel, and what men's motivations are that didn't have any men's groups cited even once. This was refreshing.
With sincere respect,
L. Steven Beene II
Nome, Alaska
Member:
Men's Activsim
iFeminism (site by syndicated columnist Wendy McElroy)
Hisside w/Glenn Sacks (respected men's radio show)
Guerilla Gender Warfare is just Hate Speech in polite text
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by Anonymous User on 01:15 PM May 25th, 2004 EST (#9)
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Steven,
Good letter.
Thundercloud.
"Hoka hey!"
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My two cents worth:
Thank you for giving a fair article about misandry. As long as it's OK to pick on certain demographic groups but not others, talk about "celebrating diversity" will come off as lip service.
I remember a Ma Bell ad from ca. 1980 that promoted call forwarding so "you'd never miss another call." Some forty-something guy was at the local recreation center and got a call that his wife ran her car into a police cruiser. Women's groups protested; the phone company promptly replaced the word "wife" with "son." I was a teenager at the time; the episode told me something about gender relations in this country. Now it's the twenty-first century and we have the makers of FluMist showing a husband as an incompetent boob. Men's groups protest; the ad survives, even though the drug company also had a gender-neutral spot showing office workers bungling a presentation because the boss was out with the flu. Why didn't we see that one more often? Of course, FluMist isn't an isolated incident.
Sexism is sexism, and I don't buy the "we meant it in good fun, don't take it seriously" defense, because it's possible to have good-natured humor that doesn't make fun of anybody (or at least doesn't single out any one group). My employer puts it thus:
"Well, maybe you think [they're] being too sensitive, but remember that we all have different perspectives. Even if you cannot imagine why the person is offended, accept and honor his or her feelings as legitimate.
"If you think your humor or teasing might be offending someone, STOP it immediately, even though you think the person is being too sensitive. Then ask yourself how you would feel in the other person's place, or how you would feel if your daughter/mother/spouse were subject to similar humor or teasing."
Not all is rotten out in marketing-land. I wrote to a shopping center's management because they had a Valentine's Day ad instructing girls to assert their right to protect themselves from their boyfriends' gift-giving ineptitude. The management sent me a kind and apologetic reply, and it looked like a personal response, not automated. (It was too late to pull the ad because the campaign was so short, but we'll see what happens next year.)
I think certain folks have hit the nail on the head when they point out that men who complain are labeled "wimps" (I hear "oversensitive" or "overreacting" myself). After all, men are supposed to be tough, right? I think too many of us are willing to let ourselves be ridiculed or vilified.
Dan Muldoon, Ph.D.
Omaha, NE
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