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Follow-Up to Workplace DV Charity Event
posted by Scott on Wednesday September 25, @04:31PM
from the news dept.
News Napnip sent me a follow-up to his workplace fundraising event for charities, which included a battered women's shelter. It seems from the dialogue that the woman could end up being educated about the hidden problem of domestic violence against men. I think the way napnip handled it also shows an effective way of challenging these myths without risking your job or even being overtly confrontational. See the Read More section for his submission.

Napnip writes, "The forum was pretty much non-confrontational. The lady who gave the presentation didn't mention many statistics, except when she said that "every 9 seconds a woman is battered". I'm not sure where she got the "9 second" figure from, perhaps on a state-wide basis (here in South Carolina). When the meeting was almost over, I said that I had a question for her. I mentioned that not long ago the FBI stated that a woman is beaten every 15 seconds, to which she wholeheartedly agreed. Then I mentioned that the FBI doesn't actually tabulate or collect statistics on domestic violence, that they actually got that number from the Family Research Laboratory. Then I mentioned that according to FRL stats, a man is also beaten once every 15 seconds. She was totally shocked when I said that. She really had a genuine look of shock on her face. I then mentioned the Dept. of Justice Violence Against Women Survey which stated men made up over 835,000 victims in '98, which amounts to 36%, and NOT the 5% myth going around. Again, she was in shock. She said that she had never heard those numbers, that she had always heard the 95-5% stats. I told her I would forward her some information from the 'net and she seemed eager to see the info. (I already had her e-mail addy since I had e-mailed her a couple of weeks ago asking advice about starting a men's shelter, and she surprisingly was very helpful.) She seems like she is open to an honest dialogue. I hope this is true."

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Shocked In Caroline (Score:2)
by Luek on Wednesday September 25, @04:41PM EST (#1)
(User #358 Info)
I am not surprised that this woman was 'shocked' to hear different stats that the politically correct ones. I am more interested in how the other members of the audience reacted. Did they ask pertinent questions?

But kudos to you for being courageous enough to challenge the agitprop of the femi-twits.

I lived in SC for almost 4 years (Charleston) and state could definitely use some shocking wakeup calls concerning men's issues.

REMEMBER,IT IS STILL PROSTATE CANCER AWARENESS MONTH...SO HELP GET THE WORD OUT BECAUSE THE MEDIA ISN'T GOING TO.
Re:Shocked In Caroline (Score:1)
by Dan Lynch (dan047@sympatico.ca) on Wednesday September 25, @09:34PM EST (#2)
(User #722 Info) http://www.fathersforlife.org/fv/Dan_Lynch_on_EP.htm
Brilliant. Maybe we will have another true activist on our honour role. I feel that many of these women are actually just going by what they heard and really want to do the right thing. Those are the ones that its important to reach. Some of them have such good hearts they are really quite invaluble. You handled it well. And you may make a convert of someone in an important place. Again, Brilliant!!!
.
Dan Lynch
Re:Shocked In Caroline (Score:0)
by Anonymous User on Thursday September 26, @01:49AM EST (#3)
Like Dan and Luek, I'm not suprised this woman was shocked, either.
What DOES suprise me is that a woman seemed to CARE at ALL.
THAT'S what suprises me.

        Thundercloud.
Re:Shocked In Caroline (Score:2)
by frank h on Thursday September 26, @08:39AM EST (#5)
(User #141 Info)
As I recall, the drama classes in my high school were mostly populated by girls. Not that I'm accusing this woman of synthesizing her shock and disbelief, mind you. But it is a tactic that has been used before. Notice how you calmed down when she reflected this amazement.

Wait for a follow-up before you give her too much credit.
No response yet.... (Score:1)
by napnip on Thursday September 26, @09:37AM EST (#6)
(User #494 Info)
That's a good point. As of today, Thurs., I haven't heard anything. That's not to say I won't, because I know she has a busy schedule. However, I forwarded some info to her early Tuesday morning, so I suspect she's had time to read it.

Time will tell......

"Force and mind are opposites; morality ends where a gun begins." -John Galt
Re:Shocked In Caroline (Score:1)
by Mark C on Friday September 27, @09:49PM EST (#7)
(User #960 Info)
On the other hand, even if we grant for the sake of arguement that her shock was feigned, I think this still counts as a victory. Simply by acting shocked (if she was acting), rather than dismissing Napnip's facts, or accusing him of trying to justify abuse of women she conceded the possibility of the legitimacy of other perspectives on DV, and hopefully the exchange planted some questions in some of the minds of those present, even if it turns out hers was not one of them.


Re:Shocked In Caroline (Score:1)
by napnip on Saturday September 28, @10:54AM EST (#8)
(User #494 Info)
Good point!

Still no response from her on the data I e-mailed her. Oh well.....

"Force and mind are opposites; morality ends where a gun begins." -John Galt
Honest Folk (Score:1)
by Uberganger on Thursday September 26, @03:44AM EST (#4)
(User #308 Info)
On the subject of the woman being genuinely shocked by some of the things you said, I think it's too easy for us to forget that not all women are manhating feminazis. Having an interest in men's issues, we're all fairly clued up about the lies feminists have told, so there's a tendency to tar all women involved with 'women's issues' with the same brush. When we do this we're just falling into the same trap as those feminists who believe that men and women are enemies engaged in a 'gender war' against each other. There must be a lot of people who, like the woman you confronted, innocently believe feminist lies and get involved because they genuinely think they're doing the right thing. They don't have an ideological hatred of men, and are basically good people who want to do good for others. If they were in charge of the DV industry there would be shelters for men and fair treatment under the law. There wouldn't be any 'primary aggressor rule' or sub-Marxist blather about the patriarchal oppression of women. The sad thing is that if this woman starts asking awkward questions about DV against men and why nobody told her about it, she may find herself out of a job.
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