Popular Blogger asks: "Why Bother"?

Submitted by sgaver on Fri, 2008-02-15 02:17

I'm seeing more and more articles about how men are staying away from marriage -- or even from women altogether. Here's one that I bumped into on Craig's list, of all places. This guy sums it up pretty well in the following passage:

"All the great advantages of the women’s liberation movement have created an environment which, frankly, does not leave men with much. We can’t flirt with women at school, college or at the office anymore, because one man’s “flirting” has become another woman’s “sexual harassment” and the punishments for such transgressions are not only severe, they’re permanent—crippling a man’s career and prospects thereof.

When a woman can get pregnant outside wedlock, and still hound a man forever for child support (with the enthusiastic support of the State), is it any wonder that men, even though ruled by their sex drive, might actually step back a little and think with their heads? And once married, if a divorce becomes a later reality, he stands a real risk of losing access to his kids forever, because if Milady is feeling vengeful—and most do, in a divorce—the merest suggestion of “endangerment” or “violence”, and he is completely screwed, forever, even if the allegation is a complete falsehood."

But I think my favorite part was the following:

"I am not interested, incidentally, in hearing the female side of this."

This guy's got the right attitude! We've heard ONLY the female side for 35+ years... who CARES about their side anymore?

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Comments

Take the time to read it and some of the comments. It is right on.

oregon dad

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Submitted by oregon dad on Fri, 2008-02-15 16:24

Excellent, well written piece that pretty much nails all the basics underlying the mens' Marriage Strike.

I especially liked this riff--

"... but I have to tell you, life isn’t much like the deliriously-happy couples on eHarmony.com. For every blissful couple in the ads, there are literally millions for whom a relationship is not a joy, but a wearisome chore."

( I should admit that I had an eHarmony girlfriend. After one week-end with me she wanted us to move in together in her very posh townhouse in Houston. That was, shall we say, a deal-breaker. I have never gone back to explore the 28 criteria for compatibility. Done, got the tee-shirt.)

Read Laura Kipnis' book "Against Love: a polemic."

It explains in very funny language why "coupledom" is doomed.

Or, if not doomed, increasingly inconvenient, illogical, and uneconomic.

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Submitted by Roy on Sat, 2008-02-16 02:18

But he said that men 19 to 27 are most ruled by their sex drive. I'm only 22, and I'm not ruled by my sex drive. It didn't take me long to get a "don't put with BS" attitude. Sex ain't worth my dignity. I know that I can find someone new if I have to put up with too much BS. But then again, he said that in his article.

This reminds me of the episode of Seinfeld where Kramer refers to marriage as a "man-made prison". It kind of is, if you think about it. It can be wonderful tho too, if you find the right person and don't rush into it.

Evan AKA X-TRNL
Real Men Don't Take Abuse!

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Submitted by xtrnl on Sat, 2008-02-16 07:02