Misandry in recent "City Journal"

I'd like to lift a toast to the young men described in your article. How exactly do you respond to a world where "maleness" is routinely denigrated, dispised, and legislated against. There is more hatred for men in western culture than there ever was for women. But then, you wouldn't see that would you? Because you can't.
I think your descriptions are 80% accurate. The fact of the matter is, women are not worth the sacrifice and marriage is a very, very bad deal for men emotionally, economically, and spiritually. And you can thank feminism for that. The USA and the westernized countries entire scheme is to protect and facilitate women, and therefore not a nice place for boys to grow up. There is a reason marriage rates are plummeting and illegitimacy is soaring (now at nearly 40% of all births) - women, in their desperation to have a child and "catch her man", are now pulling the trigger on pregnancy and using deception to do it in pitifully selfish acts of abduction and entrapment on a very wide scale. Women write about it all the time on the internet. Some advocate it "to get their commitment".
The reason young men do not want to make a commitment is it is not worth it. The women are easy, they dress like whores and throw themselves at men. And the boys have caught on to the game. Expect more of the same until the laws that "govern" reproduction and marriage are changed to benefit both sexes equally - rather than the totally one-sided atrocity we have today.

oregon dad

I don't care what she and others like her may write, say, or think. It isn't their lives and livelihoods that are on the line when they "tie the knot", at least not like it is for men.

I have always thought: If being married were as bad for women as feminists claim it is, why do so many women, like the author of this piece of crap, seem so obsessed with the topic? Hell they should be rejoicing that we have no interest either in marriage, nor for many of us, competing in the world of corporate achievements (just leaves them more room to advance). For years now the collective female political and economic psyche has been asking for, nay demanding, and working night and day, for one thing: exactly what the author describes. Now that they have it, they don't want it? They want men to want to marry them? Isn't marriage an act of patriarchal oppression and bourgeois mediocrity? They want men to have aspirations for success and dreams of abundance (to give to them of course), but don't want them standing the way of someone else (a woman)?

One thing you'll never get from the collective feminist crowd is a consistent, straight answer on anything. Goes back to what others have suggested is just the seemingly inherent tendency of women to find men objectionable (collectively) from a moral standpoint for whatever reasons-- desire to control via shaming, a need on their part to feel superior in that way as they can't in others, or whatever. No matter what the reasons the end result is the same, and as common wisdom amply shows: Women are simply never satisfied. The more crap like this they write, the more they show the point.

Now allow me to return to my bachelor's life filled with peace, quiet, and the kind of freedom only a single person can have. I ain't trading it for nothin'.

yep, thot so. we are cutting deep and it is taking it's toll. men are immature, selfish and on and on and on. whatever.

women must have marriage. the marriage strike is scaring them to death. funny, so greedy and selfish they destroy what they need to be happy, the thing that defines them most, marriage and having a real family. doesn't sound toooo smart. over fish a fishin' hole and the fish get hard to catch, and scarce. i guess women can always marry each other nowadays. do i see lotsa lesbian love on the horizon? wonder who gets all the goodies in a lesbian divorce? probably not the butch one. maybe this was the n.o.w. lesbians plan all along to get all the women.

good luck w/ all that.

I don't see why a man enjoying video games and pursuing other 'childish' interest is of any business to others. Isn't ferminism meant to eliminate gender roles to begin with.

If men truly felt threatened by women's empowerment then why are women the ones that are complaining about what men did to bring happiness in their own lives.

My answer to the question poised by the author the article. "what men want?" is to be left alone. I may not have be able to speak for all men. But how often will a man prefer that everything he does in his life at his own expense to be weighted and judged by people who had never lifted a finger for him, people such as the author. It's tiring to be constantly seeking for approval from others in order to be content with yourself.

The author will be better off admitting to her insecurities and arrogance and accept she is desperately forcing herself to a role she is has never been welcomed or qualified to play; a self-appointed authority on what man should and shouldn't do through endless shaming and resentments. Men as a group can easily figure out that getting married to pursue lifelong happiness and stability is different from getting married to be accepted and approved.

And instead thinking about what part she can play in a man's life, how can women be important to a man. You can't have any lasting relationship when it's all about what you want and expect from others. You can't try your very best at hurting people for not giving what you want and expect them to be madly in love with you at the same time.

I would also like to share my response to the article:

I was deeply offended by your misandric and bigotrous article, "Child-Man in the Promised Land". The demeaning of males and male interests runs so rampant in your article, that if you were to replace any reference of men or "child-men" with a race such as Jews, your article would be considered hate literature. Quite frankly, that is what it is. You seem to have a deeply embedded hatred towards men, and towards those that don't want to have to give an unfair amount in relationships (after all, that's how it's set up these days. Women get everything, we get the shaft.)

BTW, here are a few things in your article I would like to refute.

"Maxim plastered covers and features with pouty-lipped, tousled-haired pinups in lacy underwear and, in case that didn’t do the trick, block-lettered promises of sex! lust! naughty!"
-Cosmopolitan, a publication for females is just as bad!

"Reptilian Brain"
-If you said that about a certain race, it would be a hate crime. It still is!

"Maxim asked the SYM what he wanted and learned that he didn’t want to grow up."
-So just 'cause you don't wanna marry, means you don't wanna grow up? Well, you're not far off. Actually it means you don't want to get stuck catering to someone who doesn't wanna grow up."

"With its cutting subversion of all that’s sacred and polite, South Park was like a dog whistle that only SYMs could hear; the show became the highest-rated cable series in that age group."
-Dog whisle? Trying to compare us to dogs? What's wrong with the cliche "pig". Oh wait, you're saving that one for later. Why do you have to be so derogatory towards males?

"How did this perverse creature come to be?"
-We're the ones who are perverse? At least we don't go sleeping around to create babies to gain incomes or commitments.

"whether men are innately promiscuous, restless, and slobby,..."
-I'm a virgin, and I am not a slob

"For whatever reason, adolescence appears to be the young man’s default state, proving what anthropologists have discovered in cultures everywhere: it is marriage and children that turn boys into men."
-No, it is marriage that turns women into sniveling spoiled little girls and it is this fact that drives men away from wanting to marry

"Yesterday’s paterfamilias or Levittown dad may have sought to escape the duties of manhood through fantasies of adventures at sea, pinups, or sublimated war on the football field, but there was considerable social pressure for him to be a mensch. Not only is no one asking that today’s twenty- or thirtysomething become a responsible husband and father—that is, grow up—but a freewheeling marketplace gives him everything that he needs to settle down in pig’s heaven indefinitely"
-What duties? It sounds to me you're a firm believer in chivalry. Men are finally starting to wake up and see that it's a load of crap. We have no duties to serve anybody, unless they treat us as an equal, something you are clearly incapable of, as you defecate all over men in your article. BTW calling men children doesn't reflect well on you. If you're attracted to children, you're a pedophile. Pig's heaven? Just because men are interested in different things than women, we're pigs? You're a pig, you biggot!

"Playboy’s aspirations toward refinement still hinted at the call of the ego and a culture with limits on male restiveness; Max, the child-man who answers to no one except his fellow “assholes,” is all id—and proud of it."
-What about the Paris Hiltons, Britney Spears, and Lindsay Lohans of the world? Are they much better? They're all about shallowness, getting drunk, partying, and being irresponsible sluts, and in the case of Britney, terrible parents.

"It is also a fairy tale for guys. You wouldn’t know how to become an adult even if you wanted to?"
-We are adults, you retarded bitch! The difference between women and men is that women get a ton of ridiculous priveleges for having a vagina, and men get discriminated against for having a penis. Your article is clear proof of that.

"They suffer from a proverbial “fear of commitment,” another way of saying that they can’t stand to think of themselves as permanently attached to one woman"
-Or they don't want to get married, go through a no fault divorce, and lose everything, including their children. Think about it? If there was a puddle of quicksand, would you walk into it? Duh!

"And that “coolness” points to what may be the deepest existential problem with the child-man—a tendency to avoid not just marriage but any deep attachments"
-Hey, if you jumped through hoops over and over again just to be treated like shit by the opposite gender, you'd do the same. Just cause we don't wanna risk getting our hearts broken when some girl decides "you're not good enough", doesn't mean we don't have emotion.

"That’s too bad. Men are “more unfinished as people,” Kunkel has neatly observed."
-Could you imagine if you said Jews "are unfinished as people", you'd never get away with that. Proof of bigotry!

Ultimately your article was a waste of my time, and nothing more than male-bashing hate literature.

Evan AKA X-TRNL
Real Men Don't Take Abuse!

You are totally right. Everything you have written in your response to the author is very true. Anyway, this case reminds me of the one with Suboxone when the one who was sustaining the same clause as you are now, was the one who won in the end. So, good luck!

I think another huge reason why men don't like to get married is because they have to give a lot of their income away to their ex-wife if they get divorced. Most of these women just marry for money and fool men into thinking that they actually like them. 50% of marriages get divorced, and that's too high. All women have issues. You're lucky if you actually find one that's normal.

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