Feature Submission: Inequality Demonstrated by Condemning Male Sexuality

Alan Millard submitted a feature to MANN entitled "Inequality Demonstrated by Condemning Male Sexuality".

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     As part of our self-esteem, we acquire a behavior and an attitude that matches our personal identity. For example, many criminals come from a background of abuse and neglect. They have little self-worth, a poor self-esteem and a negative self-image. This is the category in which the male's sexuality is placed. Instead of accept male sexuality, we target it as unacceptable. And our sexuality is the core to our existence. If we feel poor about our sexuality, we feel poorly about ourselves. The more this occurs the more we damage males and society as a whole. Sexual fulfillment is very important to male health, both physically and mentally. And this exclusive male characteristic is commonly acknowledged in negative terms, despite the female's sexual solicitation. (“Sex is all men want.” But that's often all women show men they have to offer, which is conveyed by them as their primary value. Sex is a primary need of the male who is sexually stimulated by visual means.) Compatibility between men and women contributes to a complete and content result regarding sexual relations between men and women. Do you first offer a starving person food or compassion? Are the two entities combined? Often deceit is evident by women who convey their sexual effects without kindness.


     Studies have shown that a parallel exists between depriving one's freedom to indulge and problems with abuse when such freedom is inhibited. This is the case with alcohol or other indulgences. For example, many cultures and societies that don't inhibit alcohol indulgence have fewer alcoholics. And those that have fewer restrictions and hang-ups concerning sex, have fewer sex crimes. In the same way, if we accept our sex differences, and work together to make allowances for them, we will find a much happier and content society--if not unified by marriage, by compatibility, with needs at least provided for as once was the case within marriage.


     A joke is often made concerning the exploitation of the male's sexuality. He is further punished and ridiculed by religious and some traditional people who convey the endorsement of his victimization—his violation due merely to his sexuality. The following 'joke' offers an example:

A man driving down a highway sees an advertisement along the road of a house of prostitution operated by nuns. At first he thinks it's a joke, but then he sees another sign, and then a third. Finally, sure enough, he comes upon the business establishment. Thinking it's a safe haven and the money goes to a worthy cause, he investigates. He is greeted at the door by a nun in a long, black gown. He says that he wants to do business. She instructs him to deposit $100.00 in the cup, then to enter through a door at the end of the hall. He enters through the door and finds himself outside the establishment where he started, with a sign reading, "Thanks for your donation. You've just been screwed by... (the name of the church).

     This is prejudiced 'humor,' no less 'funny' than a joke about blacks or one against the female's sexuality, perhaps regarding her period. A lot of male hatred is rooted in religion, or at least associated with those practicing it, and within other traditional realms where this type of 'humor' exists. Males/boys are commonly raised to believe they, and their sexuality, are bad, and that their sexual needs as males are immoral. Look at what differences in terms exist pertaining to male versus female sexual aides, with male being pornography/illegal and female being erotica/romance. The male is put down and punished for his sexuality. This stigma, as a premise to being male, is extremely unhealthy and detrimental, but unfortunately, very common.


     The prior joke's scenario, instead of sex, could as easily concern a very hungry person paying to receive food and being sent out the door "screwed." In exactly the same way, one is blamed for being hungry and needing to eat. Perhaps this is an anti-meat establishment that advertises a steak dinner in a country where steak is illegal and very difficult to acquire, and the establishment is vegetarian.


     Here is a joke I find much more healthy, genuine and realistic:

A priest who desires to study the original scriptures is taken to a far away, isolated place. He must walk down many halls, go through many rooms, open many doors, and tolerate dusty, creepy conditions to get to where these ancient scriptures are kept. Once he arrives at the location of the scriptures, he stays there studying for many hours. A couple of days pass. When he is summoned, he appears to be very distraught and in a mild state of shock. Upon being interviewed, he claims of making a great discovery that affects the whole world. When asked what he discovered, he replied that a misspelling had caused a horrible misinterpretation and a lack of understanding regarding sexual activity, with the original scriptures, instead of the word celibate, actually reading "celebrate."

     The movie “Catch Me if You Can,” offers what one might call 'poetic justice,' portraying a sexy young woman who charges the young man she has seduced $1,000 for him to have sex with her. But since he doesn't have the cash, she accepts a $1,400.00 company check she didn't know was counterfeit, and gives him $400.00 cash as change. She got burned in her attempt to exploit a man by use of her female sexual powers.


     Religion's anti-feminist beliefs are not to be opposed. However, they stop short of an effective barrier, and fail to provide a comprehensive and thorough analogy necessary for understanding that must extract from the total realms of maleness the unadulterated truth necessary for a complete equality assessment. Thus, knowledge and understanding necessary to defend the male's equal representation concerning the equality issue, will not be brought out through religious-based means or avenues. Although religion has offered some limited barriers to feminist influence, inroads in to religion are being effectively made by feminism through religion's chivalrous channels. Any effort for men's equality within the confines of religion will eventually, amidst religion's own contents/philosophies, undermine any chances for its success. A premise of truth based on research, individual sex differences, personal understanding and acceptance is necessary for that result to occur.


     The idea of a woman being “deflowered”—contaminated—by a man for having sex with her conveys the male dirty/guilty connotation, which couldn't be more damaging to the male's identity, selfworth and equal status to the female. (Even lesbianism is often considered by some to be absent of the “contaminant.”) Any value placed on female virginity and associated “virtue” directly opposes the male's health and well-being—sexual fulfillment—which need, as food, exists whether he's single or married. By harboring this prejudice, with the female considered pure and the male dirty, the equal status of the male's sexuality and maleness to the female's sexuality and basic existence is impossible to maintain. From this premise is where many gender-biased sex laws have originated, which is the platform feminists have used to impose worse sex laws targeting men, promoting the negative perception of male sexuality, with additional laws implemented against it. There could be no worse foundation underlying male/female differences than to regard one sex as the contaminant of the other. Some believe that feminism originated through religious avenues, which is quite plausible when we see such a blatant correlation.


     One must believe in, and value the truth, and not blindly accept the wishes of others, including blind followers of religious faith or feminism. Think for yourself. Have a comfort from within, not from the outside based on others' beliefs. Any worthy god honors the truth and what is right within the face of those who claim otherwise. God is in your heart, religion is man-made. Truth and right or wrong comes from within, which quality when applied to the human condition must take into consideration the full spectrum of humanity, equally representing and accepting both sexes in its assessment. And this is done without rating one sexuality above the other, or depriving one's needs due to a belief that holds certain needs in contempt. As a condition of a normal and equal human being, our needs must be respected and accepted with dignity, not condemnation and abuse. This is where feminism and religion mesh against males.


     To entertain the sex-biased feminist efforts, is to endorse doom as well as injustice. Something as basic and genuine as male sexuality can't be targeted as bad, with the male's persecution justified, without eventually causing complete social chaos, horrendous suffering, and the destruction of the human race. Prejudice begets more prejudice. Negative produces more negative. But identifying the negative is positive. An equal amount of negative could be brought forth concerning females and their poor traits, with prejudice being produced with it, but this would serve no useful purpose. But perhaps an awareness of the female's imperfections should be included in the equation to keep the balance in check.

Alan Millard is a published writer, and author of the 563-page book, Equality: A Man's Claim, available now for only $12.00 directly from the author. E-mail him at alanlmillard-at-yahoo.com or visit the Men and Fathers For Justice web site.

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