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For a good counterweight to "Divorce War" see Jed Abraham's book "From Courtship to Courtroom: What Divorce Law is Doing to Marriage." It's a well written and powerful book sympathetically warning men about what they're up against with the divorce system in America.
I think a good approach to discussing divorce law's unfairness toward men is to also describe how it can affect women and children in negative ways. For instance it can have a punishing effect on second wives and on the children of men's subsequent marriages. Not to mention the ill effects on children when their fathers' visitation rights are disrupted by vengeful ex-wives.
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I think a good approach to discussing divorce law's unfairness toward men is to also describe how it can affect women and children in negative ways. For instance it can have a punishing effect on second wives and on the children of men's subsequent marriages. Not to mention the ill effects on children when their fathers' visitation rights are disrupted by vengeful ex-wives.
You're right that it's a good approach, but on the other hand it's a fuckin' abomination that gender based bigotry and discrimination against men is only going to garner sympathy when viewed through the lens of "How it impacts women and children."
* Putting the SMACKDOWN on Feminazis since 1989! *
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by Anonymous User on Saturday November 01, @09:53AM EST (#5)
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"How it impacts women and children."
We as men need to save them from themselves We need to take control Not sympathy
Craig
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If you're for breaking out the rifles and molotovs, by all means take control. It's what it's going to take.
If you want to win by persuasion, then you have to make people sympathetic to your cause. Sympathy does NOT equal pity; it means to view you in a favorable light.
Your call.
* Putting the SMACKDOWN on Feminazis since 1989! *
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I read this. I read this and it took me a while to be able to put into words how much this really saddened me. Look at the country we live in.
I wear my country's uniform, but because of my gender ... my country won't defend me.
My wife and I have a wonderful relationship, she's a gift. But I heard about so many fathers who have been marginalized and I decided to take up a cause. My interests, as many know here, were sparked by false rape allegations. I know that getting those laws changed, well, it'll be a while. But like many in my generation I came from a family that married and divorced. Dad wasn't well presented in my house. When I was growing up I ached .. yeah. I guess that's the only word for it. "what was wrong with me, how come my dad didn't call me?" When I started to read stories in the men's movement, about dads who really cared, but were separated from their munchkins ..... Well, I am a soldier now, and it may sound corny or sappy, but I stand watch. I don't care if someone wants to cut up this post, I still stand watch. I won't have another generation grow up feeling the way I did. So I stand watch, in a country that seems hell bent on making our dads outlaws. I think about my bro's over in Iraq. Their kinda saps too, ya know? Soldiers, most of us, we got that protective streak. Some call it chivalry, or just ... well .. there are lots of names for it. We're the ones who tuck in others and stand awake so those we watch can sleep tight. I just don't understand it. Some of these women who are promoting this, and their lawyers, they grew up with out dads. I gotta wonder, what poison was put into their hearts. Why didn't my father call? He was afraid to. I didn't know that, but now I do. I can't stop what happened to me from happening to others, and I get really sad. Why is being a father such a bad rap? Why are fathers made into villains? People break up, I know that, but the children didn't cause it, but ya know, unless a parent tells them that, they don't know it. Half of me .. who I was, I didn't know where it came from. And sometimes I would act a certain way, now I know it was his traits, and my mother would become so angry at me. But I didn't know it then. So now I am a soldier, and in the fight for father's rights, I stand guard.
To the fathers out there, the ones who really want to see their children but can't, know this: you are heroes. I can't promise you that in this world you'll be recognized as such, but .. God sees it. Every tear you cry, mostly alone, that you may or may not admit to ... God holds those tears precious. Some heroes, they make mistakes, they laugh too loud, or forget to return a movie .. ya know, their human. Real men, they put food on the table, lend a helping hand, put their family first, they withstand so their families don't have to go without. But this same country I love sooo much, is tearing out their hearts. Some of us sons ... our hearts are torn too. I don't know if this will sink in, but I hope it does: your children miss you .. don't lose heart. Some of us sons now stand guard.
Peace ...
Steven
Guerilla Gender Warfare is just Hate Speech in polite text
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by Anonymous User on Saturday November 01, @08:29AM EST (#3)
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Very well said, Steven. I have to go find the tissues. Jen
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Ok I am a sap I admit it. I unashamedly love my wife, love cuddling with my dogs, am passionate and sappy during movies and like most men am stoic about my pain in public. I just thought that I would write what I was feeling. I go through periods when I still miss having my dad in my life from when I was a child. Then I join this movement and hear over and over these gut wrenching stories from good fathers who get slammed by a system that is set up to villify, humiliate, pre-judge, and subjegate them.
I just wrote how I felt. I was trying to encourage some of the fathers here who may feel forgotten. I know from my own past: no matter how much my mother pictured him as evil I wanted to know him. I missed him sorely and wanted to show fathers what they were fighting for. I hope that is how I came across.
With abiding respect
Steven
Guerilla Gender Warfare is just Hate Speech in polite text
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