Matchmaking in China: Not romance, but a business deal

Must be seen to be believed.

China Observer documents the extreme demands made by rural brides in China. (Video here.)

Quotes:
Woman: "Do you own a house?"
Man: "Uh, yes, we have one at the village."
Woman: "So, I'll have to go and live in the village with you."
Man: "Having a house in the village is pretty good, isn't it?"
Woman: "Aren't a car and a house the basic requirements these days?"
Man: "Oh, so what are your requirements then?"
Woman: "I want a bride price of 288,000, five gold items, and a diamond ring, plus an Apple."
Man: "Apple? What Apple?"
Woman: "An Apple iPhone, of course."
Man: "But don't you already have one?"
Woman: "It's not the latest model. I want the 17 Pro Max."
Man: "Oh, is that not good enough?"
Woman: "Not good enough. That won't satisfy me."

Narrator: This is the reality of rural matchmaking. There's no romance, no shy courtship, just a checklist of material demands from the traditional expectations such as a car and the house, a high bride price, and five gold items and a diamond ring to modern-day necessities like the iPhone. This isn't about marriage. It's nothing more than blatant demands made with a sense of entitlement.

Narrator: This isn't about finding a partner for matchmaking. It's clearly about looking for someone to pick up the tab. But if you think this is the worst of it, you're underestimating the level of absurdity in the rural matchmaking market.

Man 2: "Honestly, it's really hard to find a wife these days. I'm 38. I have a house and a car, and I'm 1.78 m tall. It should be easy for me, but it's actually not. Women's expectations are too high. They already want a house in the city, at least 100 m, worth more than 600,000, which I can't afford. A few days ago, the matchmaker brought a woman along and there were six people in total. They all wanted 200 yen each as a meeting gift. And then after adding me on WeChat, they never replied. There are too many scammers like this in the matchmaking business now. I've already lowered my standards a lot. I don't care if she's a bit unattractive or short. Around 1 m is fine. She can be a bit overweight, too, as long as her character is good and she's willing to live a good life with me. But I still can't afford to get married. The average person only makes 6 or 7,000 a month. Saving 2 or 3,000 a year is already a big deal. Even after working for 20 years, you still can't afford a wedding. Looking at the bride price and the negative trends now, I feel so helpless. If I don't get married, I feel like I'm letting myself and my family down. What's the point of living if I don't have someone to rely on in my old age? If I get sick, no one will take care of me. That's the reality. It's so stressful."

...

Narrator: Interestingly, the matchmaking dilemma in cities mirrors the rural situation in a peculiar way. In rural areas, there is a leftover man crisis, while in cities, it's leftover woman anxiety. In traditional Chinese views, marriage often follows the male higher female lower matching gradient where women tend to look for men with higher economic conditions and education than themselves. While men are willing to marry women whose conditions are slightly lower than theirs. If we divide men and women by their marriage conditions into four categories, A, B, C, and D. A men marry B women. B men marry C women. C men marry D women. So who's left? the most eligible A woman and the least eligible D men. Therefore, rural leftover men are essentially the victims of the urban rural wealth gap, which causes women to flow in a one-way direction. Meanwhile, leftover women of the cities are a result of the clash between women's growing independence and the traditional mindset to admire the strong. While they seem to be living in two different worlds, both groups are ultimately struggling in the same tangled web of marriage and dating.

Full video here.