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This link is to a service that links up western guys with Russian women, so how do we know that their info and statistics are accurate and not just fluff and hype?
I find that Russian women look too much like American women and it seems that most Russian women that I've seen in the personals don't speak English. I also don't find the Russian accent sexy.
I married a Japanese woman over 30 years ago whom I met while stationed in Japan. She spoke broken English and I expected that it would improve. Wrong!!! It's a little better, but not by much. The communication is still difficult and tedious where she often makes believe she understands me when she doesn't, thinks she understands me when she doesn't, or says things using incorrect words so I think I understand her when I don't. Not to mention all the times when I haven't a clue as to what she means and have to get her to repeat what she said again in different broken English. Do you have any idea how annoying and frustrating it can be to try to communicate with someone who uses the present tense verb in 98% - 99% of her abreviated sentences and then always having to guess by the content whether she is talking about the present, past, or future?!
My biggest problem in my early 20's was that communication wasn't my overriding interest!
I will be getting a divorce soon. I've had it! (Not just because of the language gap, but the language gap is a BIG part of it). I will marry an Oriental woman again, (I wouldn't marry an American woman if they were the last women on Earth and besides, I think Oriental women are the sexiest women on Earth), but either she will know English well or I'll learn her language well.
I'll not make this same mistake again!
Dittohd
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by Anonymous User on Monday July 14, @01:47AM EST (#3)
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My wife is also Japanese. She has learnt English to the point where we can communicate with few problems and I have learnt Japanese to the same level. After a decade, we have few problems with communication.
It sounds like your wife hardly put any effort at all into learning English (and you little into learning Japanese?). Miscommunication is inevitable at such a low language ability level, but this could have been rectified by some effort on her part and thirty years was plenty of time to accomplish that.
I do recommend that you study the language of your partner (present or future) as well. It adds a whole new level of understanding.
In my experience there are two "hills" to climb in language learning: the first hill is of getting to the level of being able to communicate meaning even if the grammar/vocabulary isn't perfect. The second hill is that of true fluency, where you can communicate on an almost native level.
A lot of people climb the first hill and being able to communicate the intended basic meaning takes away their motivation to climb the second hill. What I find interesting is that it sounds like your wife didn't even get to the top of the first hill after thirty years (assuming you lived in an English speaking country during that time).
To the other men here: It is difficult to adjust to the culture/language of a wife from another culture/country, yet the process of learning about that culture is interesting too; but you both have to be willing to put the effort into learning the other’s language/culture. (If you live in an English speaking country, maybe she can just learn English, but you will miss out IMO, and it will make it harder to communicate.)
These women have the full range of personality types, so it's not as if foreign automatically equals all the things you want in a wife but can't find in an American/Western woman; you still have to choose with care. The vital difference that makes it all worthwhile IMO is the absolutely refreshing lack of man-hating, feminist, eternal-chip-on-the-shoulder indoctrination.
MuDog
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>It sounds like your wife hardly put any effort at all into learning English (and you little into learning Japanese?)
You are right. I tried to learn Japanese at the beginning level (I took Japanese I and II college courses, which included some writing also) but didn't go further. Since we have lived in the U.S. after I got out of the military, I figured that me learning Japanese fluently would lead to using it all the time and my wife would never make any effort to really learn English. I also figured that the less English she used and learned, the less independent she would be when I wasn't around.
Would she have learned more English if I had learned more Japanese? I doubt it. She used to use me not learning much Japanese as an excuse for her not properly learning English, but then my wife has always been good at excuses. I don't buy it.
As far as cultural differences, I found that based on the way I was brought up, most of the Japanese cultural ways fit right into my upbringing and personality, so in most cases, I like the Japanese ways.
I will admit this. I should have learned Japanese fluently regardless. I've never been good with languages, having barely passed Spanish I and flunking Spanish II in high school. The only course I ever flunked. I had to take Spanish II again in summer school to pass it since it was a requirement to graduate from high school at the time. I shouldn't have used this as an excuse, though. It should have meant that I just had to work that much harder. My fault here. Learning to speak Japanese fluently definitely would have enriched my life, regardless of what my wife did or didn't do.
Dittohd
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A recent report on 60 minutes or one of its clones in Australia interviewed three Aus men who had married Russian wives and been kicked out of their houses within 9 months of the wedding. In all three cases the wives used false accusations of DV to have their husbands removed from his own home. Only one case was tried and the husband was acquitted, but the order excluding him from his house remains. In the other two cases the Russian party didn't want charges laid, but this is no barrier to obtaining and maintaining a DV order in this country.
All foreign women coming to Australia on fiancee visas are shown a video by immigration which tells them how to do this.
Tim
Those who like this sort of thing
will find this the sort of thing they like.
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Sounds kind of like "Invasion of the Body Snatchers," but instead of aliens invading the Earth to take over human bodies, it's Russian women invading Australia to take over houses.
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by Anonymous User on Wednesday July 16, @08:20PM EST (#7)
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Don't blame Russian women; blame domestic violence persecution that ignores the rule of law, the presumption of innocence, etc.
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