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I am doing something different with this letter, as I think I've written enough patient and polite letters over time to deserve to express a bit of emotion occasionally.
This time I am not bothering to debunk facts. Rather, I am trying to articulate the heart of the issue which is the demonization of men that the article creates in a facade of examining male violence objectively. I'm also quite willing to express unabashed indignation for being included in the article's condemnation of masculinity.
I don't expect it to be printed, and that's not my concern. It is more of a cathartic release for me to have written this so I can move on and continue to work on more positive things. Thus I am not really interested in criticism of it from an effectiveness point of view. Just read it and perhaps you'll find that it speaks some truths that need to be told.
Regards,
Scott
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To the editor:
Your August 7 Cover Story, "Why Do Men Do It?", is one of the most sensationalized tirades over "male violence" that I've read in a long time. While it is true that men commit greater proportions of many violent crimes, the analysis that Chris Wood and Rima Kar give does almost nothing to contribute to an understanding of the motivations behind male violence and what can be done about it.
I would liken the analysis to the old model of the solar system, where everyone believed the the sun and planets orbited the earth because it was "obvious" that we were stationary. After some time, however, awareness of new causal factors arose which made it clear that the earth instead revolved around the sun.
So it is with this article. Examples of outrageous killings by men are cited as proof that there is something inherent in masculinity that causes violence. References to vague relationships with testosterone are used as "evidence" that this is the killing hormone that men thrive on. This is quite useful ammunition for misandrists, who can use it to implicate *all* men as potential killers, abusers, and rapists.
These links are shallow and do no justice to the complex realities of life which motivate people to act. The most basic proof of this is that most men *aren't* killers, rapists, or abusers, which I note is not even acknowledged in the article. In case you are unaware of this, these instances of extreme violence by men is the exception to the rule, and the media tends to focus on this because it sells well and appeals to the lowest common denominator: shock value. If promoting hate and fear between the sexes was the goal of this article, it did an excellent job by making sweeping generalizations on the nature of masculinity using a few aberrant examples of men gone bad.
Sociologists will tell you that a common factor in most murders and rapes is the extreme degree of powerlessness that the perpetrator feels. The fact that most of the murders mentioned in this article ended in the man killing himself strongly suggests that this isn't anything remotely resembling normal male behavior, but that these men have been put into situations that they have no hope of recovering from. Thus they go out on these rampages which represent a final lashing out against their powerlessness, which ends in their own death.
If you can't imagine how a man can feel powerless in today's world then try to put yourself in men's shoes and look at how we are viewed by the media. Men today have little to feel good about themselves, as they are continually demeaned as oppressors, dead beats, harassers, rapists, killers, and abusers. Men's role in society has been reduced to being a wallet for others (usually women and children which the man doesn't even get to see) to exploit. Men are no longer admired for their positive achievements, which are many throughout history. Yet, I am constantly amazed that despite the constant attacks on men by articles such as this, they continue to labor thanklessly for the betterment of society and their families.
Men are thoroughly trashed by the court system in divorce and child custody disputes, and I know that Canada is much like the US in this regard. Should it be no wonder that when men lose the support of a loving partner and must contrast it with the hatred of males from society that some cannot handle this and go berserk? I think saying that violence against women and children is inherent in masculinity is hardly an explanation that has any solutions other than to kill masculinity. Why not try giving men decency, dignity, and support and see what happens? I don't believe this solution has been tried yet.
The worst irony is that articles such as this contribute to hatred and disdain for men, and will only increase the problem of male violence. The closing line of the article, "Men will kill and injure. Women and children will do the suffering," sums it up perfectly. How could anyone read this and not resent men? You have done a great disservice to us all by printing this article, and are sabotaging people who are trying to unpolarize the sexes and really understand human behavior.
Sincerely,
Scott Garman
PS - My assertions about men going berserk due to the family court system has basis in fact, see the UK Times article, "CSA demands 'drove father to kill himself'" by Alexandra Frean in the August 3, 2000 edition.
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